Blankly at 4:30

Its  already 4:30 in morning and I cant even sleep at all.

Already switch off the lamp, covered myself with blankets and then put it aside a few minutes later. Forcing to close my eyes, cursing myself "why you acted like this?!"

And then, trying to calming myself. Staring stars at my rooms ceiling blankly.

This things.. Is challenging my mental, emotional and physical

I'm writing this journal because I dont know since when I became like 'this' became a forgetful person:badly. Its hard to remember even the small things